Our Perceptions Create our Reality

Your reality is created by your thoughts

We don’t see the world as it is – we see the world as we are! Therefore our perceptions create our reality. This is one of the statements I use when introducing the powerful personality system I work with called the Enneagram.  The Enneagram brings ancient wisdom together with modern psychology to reveal 9 patterns of being in the world.  Though we all share a bit of each of the 9 types within us, one is deeply part of our personality from womb to tomb. Read more

Weekend in the Woods

click image to enlarge

click image to enlarge

I just spent the most amazing weekend in the woods out in the Hockley Valley; an event hosted by Visions in the Woods proprietor Deborah Kolody and a team of incredible leaders.

It was an outdoor event literally in the beautiful woods of Hockley with many vendors sharing their gifts and services with each other and the participants. The theme was experiencing the elements of water, fire, wind, earth and storm and I must say they were present at every level. Read more

The Power of the Circle

Women's CircleHappy 2014! It is vividly cold for us here in Southern Ontario yet the sun is shining and that combination makes me feel very alive!  I am reminded that I always find myself feeling this alive and connected at the close of each month’s Women’s Circle. The Power of the Circle never ceases to amaze me – there is a foundational peace that resides when a group of like-minded people gather together in circle.

Founded 10 years ago by Jill Hewlett, the York Region Women’s Circle has been meeting monthly at various locations, bringing a diverse yet connected group of women together to share, learn, experience and laugh. I began hosting the summer outdoor circles at our beautiful acreage in Holland Landing many years ago and soon joined to co-host throughout the year. We now offer two locations every month with Jill hosting a Toronto location and I carrying forward the York Region group.

Every month we feature a different presenter to share their journey and talents.  It is experiential, nurturing and oh so much fun! Every month has first time attendees and those who rarely miss.  New friendships are made and new ideas germinated that bring women to something they never thought of before. There is an uplifting that is so valuable in our busy lives. When we participate in the circle, we find our power increase exponentially like a drop of water rippling on the surface of a pond.  There is power in numbers and when the commitment is made by many to come together in a circle to focus attention and joy, the circle emanates ripples of energy that can change the world.

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Reiki in the Kitchen

Karen Armstrong - Reiki Master Newmarket

Last weekend I taught a Reiki Level 2 certification class. It was a joyful experience in so many ways.  As we sat down to lunch, one of my students commented that he didn’t know what he looked forward to more, the teachings or the yummy home-made lunch!  He even suggested that I start a new blog entitled “Reiki in the Kitchen!”  Well, I chose to start out with a single blog on this topic because it really did speak to me on the capacity of bringing the healing power of reiki to whatever we do.

I love to cook and prepare meals that nourish our soul and to sit at a table with others to share just adds more joy to the whole event!  When we spend time at the reiki training to open our heart and learn the sacred teachings of the Usui natural healing system, it only seems to fit that we also take time to nourish our bodies with healthful food to support the day.  I love to take time looking through my cook book collection to find just the right dishes to share for the time of year. I tend to focus around a soup dish and this past weekend was no exception.  I chose a recipe from Julie Daniluk’s book entitled “Meals that Heal Inflammation” called Ginger Butternut Soup. I will share the recipe below.  Served along with a salad of fresh baby greens, basmati rice and bread, it warmed our bellies and prepared us for the afternoon session.

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What are Cultural Creatives?

Cultural CreativesCultural Creatives are a growing segment of the Western population transforming mainstream culture.  Driven by their holistic values, integrated worldview and ability to synthesize vast amounts of information with an inner vision (insight) of wholeness, Cultural Creatives are in the author’s words, an “emerging wisdom culture”.

This was the opening of an article I happened to find in the latest Pathways to Family Wellness magazine that I get at Foster Family Chiropractic. I was very taken by what author Paul H. Ray, a social scientist had to share from his years of research about this group of people.  I related it to my life and to the groups that I am part of and realized that this brought more insight into the reasons why I am drawn to being part of or coordinating these groups. As I was preparing for a talk at one of them, the Green Connections Networking Group, I found the synchronicity of this article beautiful. Let me share a few highlights of what the article covered. Read more

Life Omnipresent Victoriously Expressed

L – Life

I – Onmipresent

V – Victoriously

E – Expressed

By “life omnipresent”, I mean that life is present in all things.  It is not only in human beings, but in animals, trees, rocks – in every living thing, every object. Even a table is composed of the same energy that we are. It is part of the interrelated whole. It has function and is going through it’s own transformational process.  The same is true of the 75 million cells that make up the human body, and of every particle in each of those cells.  Not a single one is exactly like another, and each has it’s own destiny.  If we can accept this truth, perhaps we can learn to stop judging other things and other beings by limited human or cultural standards.  That would be a great advance, for it is judging that holds us back from giving and receiving unconditional love.

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Supporting Our Transition – Why and How We Shift

transitional shiftingThere is one constant in this universe and that is change!  We tend to create stress in our lives when we are constantly looking for stability, defined as “no changes”.  We can definitely create stability however it looks different.  It is an inner state rather than an outer state. And with so many of my clients feeling the effects of change and transition very intensely right now, my attention was peaked while reading the latest issue of PATHWAYS to family wellness magazine.  I would like to share a portion of one of the articles here with you entitled “Why and How we Shift”.

IONS (Institute for Noetic Sciences) did a 10 year project looking at consciousness transformation. And we looked at the catalysts that shift someone. It can be anything…people describe something as mundane as washing dishes, or as in the case of Edgar Mitchell, as profound as coming back from the moon, that would allow a moment of reflection to say, “Wow! I just feel there is something more here.” It could be the death of a loved one or the loss of a job, a divorce…all of these can be helpful to disrupt our current state.  It’s really beautiful when we can move our conversation about something that is traumatic into something that can help us grow and evolve, because that’s the worldview shift. It’s how we define the situation.  One person can see it one way and another person can see it another way.  It is how we can begin to own the power of the interpretation of the experience.

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Lessons in Mirroring

bigstock-Raging-kids--children-shoutin-30047846This topic has come about so frequently with clients and in my own life over the past few weeks that it felt like a great topic to write about.  This subject of mirroring is not a simple process to understand however it can be very powerful.  In the big picture, I always say that “we do not see the world as it is, we see the world as we are!”  This means that we interpret our outer experiences from the perspective that we hold at any given time.  If we wake up one morning over-tired and not in a great mood, the experiences of our day seem to reflect that mood that we hold!  As Abraham would say:, “The worse it gets, the worse it gets!!”  Thankfully, the opposite is true too:, “The better it gets, the better it gets! Read more

Enneagram Type Nine – Finding Your Passion

LoveWhatYouDoI recently received a comment from a reader on my Enneagram Type Nine blog: that went like:

“Thanks for your really helpful comments, which I wish I could instantly digest and do something about! Would be interested in your thoughts on type 9s identifying their passion which I know is a problem for them.”

So I answered him back with my thoughts but also advised that I would check in with my expert panel themselves, the Type Nines, to see what insight could be gleaned.  Well – it was a beautiful experience and I believe great information for the Nine in all of us.  Here is a summary of the responses that I received.

You have to push yourself, take risks, get out of your comfort zone, try something new and give yourself permission to do something that may make you stand out and may not be what everyone expects of you.  If you haven’t found your passion in the world that you have created for yourself you have to venture out further to find it.  I think usually fear is what holds us back from reaching for the next level and challenging ourselves; fear of failing, fear of making a mistake, fear of being judged, fear of being noticed, fear of disappointing someone … and maybe even fear of success.  I have discovered that the only thing you should fear is standing still and not growing.”

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Understanding Emotional Intelligence

emotional intelligenceBack in 1995 a new best seller hit the bookstores called “Emotional Intelligence”, by Daniel Goleman and the impact it had on my business career was significant.  I recall reading this book and feeling such a resonance with the material like there was finally scientifical proof to so much of what I instinctually knew to be true.  I ended up becoming certified in giving the EI assessment and from there was introduced to an incredible tool for developing our emotional intelligence called the Enneagram!

To this day, I believe that how well we handle our daily interactions and life stresses are based more on how developed our emotional intelligence skills are than anything else. In fact when we are not processing our emotions effectively; it creates the opportunity for energy imbalances to manifest and these show up as dis-ease symptoms in the body. Yes – I believe that every physical symptom in the body first originated at the emotional level.

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Let your Self-Expression Flow

2013 - Hawaii 2 307aTo continue along the same vein as my last post about taking personal responsibility, I found this passage in a wonderful book entitled, “It’s not what you eat, it’s what eats you.” by Jack Schwarz. And in this blog post, we’ll explore the barriers we have in life and how to overcome them by letting our own self-expression flow.

“Too often we set our potentials aside and put our desires on hold for someone else’s apparent sake. We create conflicts which don’t need to exist, either an inner conflict of, Should I or Shouldn’t I? or an attempt to justify our lack of expression because of what others expect of us.  Too often we create a time schedule by which self-expression, if it comes at all, can come only after we have fulfilled all social expectations, only to find that those never end.  We need to know what to do now, and then do it, in spite of everything else.  Spontaneity is not easy, especially for those of us who have family or obligations incurred by other structured situations.  Expectations repress natural spontaneity.

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The Enneagram & Enneagram Subtypes

click image to enlarge

click image to enlarge

I recently attended a phenomenal weekend workshop with Helen Palmer and Terry Seracino entitled “Observing the Hidden Barriers in Relationships”.  It focused on the Enneagram personality system and specifically the three subtypes that play out in our relationships. The weekend was rich in exercises, witnessing and experiencing how these inner habits of focus can play out within our interactions.  I thought some of you may be curious to learn a bit about these subtypes; so here we go.

“Our conditioned Enneagram type structure is defined by a pattern of thought supported by an emotional habit (historically called the passion of the heart) which plays out in three critical behaviours called Subtypes that affect our relationships as well as how we spend our time and energy.”

These three subtypes can also be referred to as instinctual energy and I will give a brief overview here taken from the notes of the weekend workshop.

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What Energy Does 2013 Hold for You?

EnergyHappy 2013 to all!!  As we move fully into this new year and new beginnings, what energy do you feel it holds for you?  I typically begin my new year not with resolutions but a few words or phrases that hold a feeling of what I want to invite into my year ahead.

Last year my words were; Clarity, Focus and Expansion and it definitely was the overall feel of my year.  I added the Biophoton Light Therapy to my practice with a certification course led by Paul McDonald of Meridian Energies in Clarksburg which was an expansion in many ways for me. I began the year with a 10 weeks Holistic Nutrition course with Shawn Nisbet and an 8 week early morning Yoga Challenge with Corrine Penstone at Yoga Source.  I also nurtured my spiritual journey with a program called Tending My Soul Garden with Andrea Mathieson of Raven Essences.  It was a focused and big learning year.

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2013 – Preparing for New Beginnings

new-beginningsWell – here we are 1 week before Christmas day and 2 weeks left in 2012!   I know you may be fully engulfed in preparing for the activities that are abundant right now so what am I doing talking about “preparing for new beginnings”?

This is a new beginning time for me every year because I happen to have my birthday in December.  I seem to be drawn to completing unfinished projects before my birthday and to begin thinking about my next year.  The other pattern for me in December is to give my home a thorough cleaning before I put up any Christmas decorations.  The thought of adding beauty to clutter just feels like adding clutter to clutter.

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Realize Your Goals in 2012

Welcome to realizing your goals in 2012!  I am excited to begin this year as I feel the shift of new beginnings and new ways of being!  Whether you are a resolutions making type or not – the New Year often brings up questions of “what’s next!” for all of us. Though I do not create resolutions per se, for the past few years I come up with a word or phrase which becomes an overall theme for what I do in the year. My words last year were Clarify and Expand and as I reflect on the year, it was a definite theme!! This year,

This year as I have been pondering this question – the words that have come forth are Courage and Discipline – Courage to continue speaking my truth with a loving heart and discipline to deepen my spiritual practice.  I am sure that I am not alone when I report that I get on a really good path of daily meditation or journaling, weekly commitments to work on my business instead of just working in my business and then life happens! I get a diversion for a short period and it takes me longer than I realize to get back on track.  Now, I realize that diversions will always come up; however I can certainly get back on track with much more expediency.

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Following 11.11.11 – Living Your Life at Peak Performance

11-11-11 was a special day whose significance extends beyond its unique date. It was special because the entire world shared in the hope, blessings and meaning of this day. Around the world people shared conversations that focused on enlightenment, possibilities and potential. But the world didn’t end (it wasn’t supposed to) and we continue with our life journey. Now that 11-11-11 has come and gone, we must focus on carrying the energy’s momentum into the days following it. We do that by practicing integration, staying aligned with our intentions and putting them into practice to live at our peak performance every day. Like any other energetic shift, it’s what we do after it happens that is important. As Jennifer Hoffman simply put it, “the Universe delivers the energetic package, but we have to open it and decide where its contents should go”.

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Life Balance and the Enneagram

I recently spoke at a wellness event about life balance with reference to the Enneagram.  This is an important focus for me and hence the tag line under my business name.  There are many ways to look at balancing our lives and all of them will bring awareness because we are taking time to reflect on our own situation.  If we did this more frequently, we may even avoid the experience of spending long periods of our life out of balance!

For my presentation, I decided to once again focus on the wisdom of the Enneagram to bring insights on how each of us may get out of balance.  The Enneagram is a dynamic personality system that highlights 9 different ways of thinking, feeling and acting in the world as well as acknowledging the accompanying strengths and challenges each type connects with.  Previous blog entries have covered an overview of each of the nine types if you require more detailed information here.

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Adapting Your Business in Changing Times

Fall is officially here and so too is the fourth quarter of 2011! I attended a wonderful business symposium last week entitled “Business Innovation in Changing Times”. It was focused to give small and medium sized businesses access to ideas and insights to adapt their businesses to the changing marketplace.  The afternoon keynote speaker was Arlene Dickinson, CEO of Venture Communications and co-star of CBC’s Dragons Den. She shared real stories of her life journey and the lessons she learned about how to succeed in business and as an entrepreneur. They were tough, funny and very relate-able, especially for the women in the audience.  Arlene highlighted the incredible opportunity we have in Canada to live a life that we choose.  To remember what motivates us and to take opportunities when they present themselves and figure out the how tos along the way.  I look forward to reading more about her life lessons from her new book “Persuasion”.

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Power Hour – Intention, Commitment & Action

I took a wonderful personal development course with Klemmer & Associates a number of years ago that provided me with many lasting pieces of wisdom to follow in my life.  The one I want to expand on today was an equation that went like this:

Intention + Mechanism = Results

We got into great discussions on what % we felt belonged to the left hand side of the equation if the right hand side was 100%.  At the end of the discussion, we realized that the answer was:

Intention (100%) = Results (100%)  The mechanism doesn’t matter as long as our intention is strong enough.  Anyone who has 100% commitment to their intention will ALWAYS get results because there are millions of mechanisms to support any given result.  The challenge is that we tend to carry too many to-do lists in our heads and do not give total commitment to any particular one.  We lack clarity and priority so we make slow or no progress.

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Enneagream – Type 9 The Gentle, Even-Keeled Type

You can see easily from different points of view and tend to agree with people more than disagree with them.  You feel like you have to take what life brings you because you can’t do much about it anyway. You are pretty easy to please and usually feel that what you have is good enough for you.  If these statements resonate with you then read on to learn more about Type Nine.  Remember that we have a bit of all types within us, so look for the way Type Nine shows up in you.

Type Nine can be called The Peacemaker, The Comforter, The Mediator, The Healer and the Utopian.  Nines are the type most dedicated to looking for internal and external peace in themselves and others.  They work to maintain an inner peace of mind and prefer to create harmony in their environment. It is very challenging for them to focus on negative or disturbing issues and they will tend to just avoid them. It can be confusing for Nine’s to self type themselves and I believe this is summed up perfectly in the Riso/ Hudson book, The Wisdom of the Enneagram with this passage:

“We have sometimes called the Nine the crown of the Enneagram because is at the top of the symbol and because it seems to include the whole of it. Nines can have the strength of Eights, the sense of fun and adventure of Sevens, the dutifulness of Sixes, the intellectualism of Fives, the creativity of Fours, the attractiveness of Threes, the generosity of Two’s, and the idealism of Ones.  However, what they generally do not have is a sense of really inhabiting themselves – a strong sense of their own identity.  Ironically, therefore, the only type the Nine is not like in the Nine itself.  Being a separate self, an individual who must assert herself against others, is terrifying to Nine’s.” (page 316)

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Type Eight, The All or Nothing Type on the Enneagram

You have big energy and passion for life, wanting to make a difference in this world. Truth and justice are extremely important and you are ready to take a stand and fight for what is right.  You know what you want and are always ready to take action towards it.  This is your life and you will take charge of it, there is no question of that!  If these statements resonate with you, then read on to learn of the motivation of Type Eight on the Enneagram.  Remember that we have a bit of all types within us, so look for the way Type Eight shows up in you.

Type Eight can be called The Challenger, The Boss, The Top Dog, and The Leader.  Out of all the types, it is our Eights who are ready to take on challenges in the world for themselves and will encourage others to stretch their boundaries. They have enormous willpower and vitality and they feel most alive when they are exercising these capacities in the world. They want to make a difference in their environment whether that be the community or the world because bigger is always better! They work hard, play hard and crash hard, hence the “All or Nothing”, persona that gets developed.  At a young age they decide that they will be in charge of their life and realize they have the fortitude to protect others if justice is to prevail. The basic fear of eights is of being harmed or controlled by others so they become masters of protection.  They have great capacity to withstand physical punishment without complaint; however they are more sensitive to emotional hurt and protect this vulnerability with a layer of emotional armor. This is a double edged sword because on the one hand it does give them a sense of safety and on the other, it creates distance from others and their efforts to show love through action can be misunderstood. As human beings, we want to experience intimacy which often requires seeing the softer more vulnerable side of another. It takes great courage and trust for Eights to show their vulnerable side.

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Enneagram Type 7, The Fun-Loving Enthusiast

Are you the type who looks at the world as a big smorgasbord and you can’t wait to taste a bit of everything?  Like a kid in a candy store ever watchful of what will grab your attention next. You love the excitement of creating and starting new projects, meeting new people or sitting down to choose which of your current stack of books to read. It’s only Monday but you are delighting in planning all the options available for the coming weekend.   If so – read more to learn more about the motivation behind our charismatic Type Seven. Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own way of being.

Type Seven can be called the Enthusiast, The Epicure, The Adventurer, The Visionary or The Generalist.  Sevens are frequently endowed with quick, agile minds and can be exceptionally fast learners. This is true both of their ability to absorb information and for new manual skills – they tend to have excellent mind-body coordination and manual dexterity.  All of this can combine into the quintessential Renaissance person. Because they are able to pick up many different skills with relative ease, it becomes more difficult for them to decide what to do with themselves. You won’t find Sevens getting too bogged down with negative thoughts however – they are constantly looking at the bright side of any situation and will learn from everything. Instead of paying attention to inner negative feelings and anxiety that arises when they are out of touch with their inner guidance, they keep their minds busy all the time searching for the stimulation brought about by new experiences. Boredom is not an option.  Commitment can be a challenge when you never know what exciting possibilities could surface around the next corner.

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Type 6 – The Enneagram Loyal Realist

Nine Ways of Relating in Life

If you believe that this world is just not predictable and you want to be prepared for what the day might bring:  If you like to take some time to check people out before inviting them into your friendship fold or you are the type that tends to ask many questions or serve as the devil’s advocate because you can see the pitfalls in any plan, then follow along to learn more about the drive of Type Six, the Enneagram Loyal Realist and how that can play out in our lives.

Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own way of being.

Type Six can be called the Loyalist, the Questioner, the Skeptic, the Devil’s Advocate or the Guardian.  They like to call themselves a Realist when others suggest they are a pessimist.  They are called the Loyalist by Enneagram authors because Sixes are the most loyal to their friends and their beliefs. They will hang on to relationships longer than most other types. They will fight for their beliefs more than themselves and defend their community or family more tenaciously than they will defend themselves. The underlying fear is one of not believing they have support or guidance so they rely on trusted others, structures and support outside themselves for these.  They have great inner guidance however they second guess themselves and do not trust their own thinking and judgments.  They can over think issues and worry about many life issues.  This can result in difficulty in making big decisions though they for sure do not want others making the decisions for them. There can be a steady presence of anxiousness within Type Six and a constant striving to ease this feeling.  Many will talk about having a Plan A, a Plan B and likely a Plan C for many occasions just to be prepared!

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Type 5 Enneagram – The Wise and Private One

Nine Ways of Relating in Life – Type Five

Are you drawn into understanding why the world works as it does, curious to figure out why things are as they are – whether it be the cosmos, the animal, plant or mineral kingdom or the inner world of your imagination? Are you always searching, asking questions and delving into things in depth? If these questions resonate with you, then follow along to learn more about the drive of the Enneagram Type Five and how that can play out in our lives.

Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own way of being.

Type Five can be called the Investigator, The Thinker, The Innovator, The Observer, The Specialist or The Expert.  Knowledge, understanding and insight are highly valued by Fives and they are constantly on a journey of learning.  “A day without learning is like a day without sunshine.”  They prefer to learn through reading and observing rather than participating right away. A type Five’s attention is drawn to the unusual, the overlooked, secretive, the occult, the bizarre or otherwise unknown territory where they can carve out a niche of expertise! To have a degree of expertise will allow them to feel capable and connected with the world which they otherwise feel deep insecurities about their ability to function successfully in. They dislike things that distract their focus and enjoy private time regularly to just be with their thoughts and ideas. Our Fives are minimalists and don’t have a lot of stuff – but what they do have is valued highly so “Don’t touch my stuff!” All this talk about thinking – where’s the feeling? Well, Five’s definitely have feelings as we all do, they just keep them compartmentalized because feelings can’t be trusted…only the mind can! One of my type five friends once shared her favourite children’s rhyme at a workshop and I am sure you’ll get the connection.

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Enneagram Type 4 – The Sensitive & Creative Person

Nine Ways of Relating in Life

Do you have a deep yearning to search for the meaning of life? Are you motivated to express your authenticity, to experience your feelings, to be understood and absolutely run from anything you deem “ordinary”? If these statements resonate with you, then follow along to learn more about the drive of Type Four and how that can play out in our lives.

Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own way of being.

Type Four’s can be called the Individualist, The Artist, The Connoisseur, The Melancholic, or The Special One.  Fours maintain their identity by seeing themselves as fundamentally different from others.  Fours feel that they are unlike other human beings, and consequently, that no one can understand them or love them adequately. They often see themselves as uniquely talented, possessing special, one-of-a kind gifts, but also as uniquely disadvantaged or flawed.  However as talented as these types are, there is often a sense that something is missing in themselves or in their life although they may have difficulty identifying exactly what that something is.  Fours have the ability to find meaning in life and to experience feelings at a deep level.  They admire what is noble, truthful and beautiful in life. They can also establish warm connections with people, are very creative, intuitive and can have a good sense of humour.  Because Four’s respond to the world from an inner sense of what they are feeling, many daily decisions are also based upon how they feel such as what to wear, what to eat or what to plan on a free day. This makes advance planning more challenging. I have a friend whose husband can not make a weekly meal plan work; “How could you decide on Sunday what you want to have for supper on Thursday?  That just doesn’t work for me!”  This sensitivity can also have them experience dark moods or periods of melancholic dreaming and they can be quite hurt when someone misunderstands them.

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Just Do It – The Enneagram’s Type Three

Nine Ways of Relating in Life – Are You a Type 3?

 

Ready-Set-Go! Do you love to keep yourself busy?  Like to make to-do lists, set goals, have a plan and don’t mind putting in the time and focus to accomplish what you set out to do?  Do you love competition and have that natural optimistic attitude about life? If these statements resonate with you then follow along to learn more about the drive of the Enneagram Type Three and how that can play out in your life.

Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own way of being.

Type Three’s can be called the Achiever, the Motivator, The Performer, The Succeeder, The Initiator.  Decisive, risk-taking, adaptable and optimistic; no type equals the Three in terms of energy and motivation. They expect success and more often than not, they get it.

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The Enneagram – Understanding a Type Two

Nine Ways of Relating in Life – Are You a Two?

Would you consider yourself a real people person?  That life is about relationships; of being needed by others in your life to support them and keep them in a happy place whenever possible?  Do you always like to see the best in others?  Do you intuitively know what kind of mood someone is in without having to ask? If you find yourself nodding with agreement, then read on to learn more about Type Two.

Remember that we all have a bit of every type in us so it is valuable to explore how each type fits into our own being.

Type Twos can be called the Helper, the Giver, the Loving Person, the Caretaker.  Twos are motivated to be appreciated by others, to be helpful and so earn love. They fear rejection.  A huge amount of effort, often to the point of exhaustion, is put out to meet other people’s needs. Twos have a built-in radar to know how to respond to all types of people and to say and do just the right thing.  This sensitivity operates without really having to work at it.  There is an underlying need to receive approval and Two’s tend to be very flattering and positive, always bringing attention to others strengths. If you have a Two in your life, they will always remember your birthday and spend time picking out the perfect card, if you are going through a tough time, expect them to be right there to support you, if you are in charge of a big project, then find a Two to help make it happen.  That is the Twos typical style – to find leaders whose cause they believe in and be the power behind the throne – not the one in the spotlight.  You will wonder how you could ever have done it without them!!  And that is exactly how they want to place themselves.  A Two can be juggling all their balls in the air and if you happen to ask them for help – you got it, the answer is always Yes!  That is definitely a challenge for our Twos – saying no.  They can become drained because of all the doing for others.  After all – it is not okay for THEM to ask for help.  They also have trouble knowing what it is that they truly want as all the focus is on what others want.

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Nine Way’s of Relating in Life – Let’s Start with Type One

The Enneagram – Are You a Type 1?

Do you like to be organized and orderly? Do you like to be on time? Do you tend to see things in terms of right or wrong, good or bad? Is it difficult to be spontaneous? You don’t like it when people break the rules! Do you think of yourself as practical, reasonable and realistic? If these statements resonate with you, then you may wish to look further at Type One on the Enneagram.

I will cover a basic overview of each of the nine types as we go through the next weeks.  What is most important to understand, is that we have some of all types within us so it is helpful to understand how each one looks at and responds to the world around them.  Besides, we are sure to have someone of every type in our own circle of influence and understanding someone who sees things differently than we do, creates opportunity for less stressful interactions.

Type One can be called the Reformer, The Perfectionist or The Judge. Ones are motivated from a deep inner message to be good, to have integrity and to be balanced. They are idealists and want to make the world a better place. There is an active inner critic that operates full time within the One’s mind steering their thoughts, feelings and actions to do the right thing. Ones are conscientious and ethical, with a strong sense of right and wrong. They are teachers, crusaders, and advocates for change: always striving to improve things, but afraid of making a mistake. Well-organized, orderly, and fastidious, they try to maintain high standards, but can slip into being critical and perfectionistic. They typically have problems with resentment and impatience.

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Nine Ways of Relating in Life – What’s Yours?

Secrets of the Enneagram

This is the first in a series of articles designed to explore your personality type through the wisdom and teachings of the Enneagram, (any-a-gram).  With its roots dating back 2,500 years, the Enneagram describes nine patterns of thinking, feeling and acting in the world. All individuals have one of these nine types as the preference for how they view and interact in the world.

Over the last 30 years the Enneagram has been gaining respect from the business community, counselors, therapists and spiritual teachers around the world. In 1993 the Stanford University School of Business began to incorporate the Enneagram into its program and the CIA uses it to help agents understand the behaviour of individual world leaders. Top Fortune 500 companies consult experts in the field and the number of books and courses available has exploded.  A search on Google will result in 1000s of listings for books, teachers, typing instruments or articles.

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